Ubushakashatsi bwakozwe na Dr. Celestin Mutuyimana, bwagaragaje ko ababyeyi b’Abanyarwanda badahererekanya gusa ihungabana hagati mu miryango yabo, ahubwo banahererekanya ubudaherarwa bwabo mu guhangana na ryo.
Uyu mushakashatsi w’Umunyarwanda asanzwe ari umuganga uvura indwara zo mu mutwe cyane cyane izibasira imitekerereze n’amarangamutima akaba n’umwarimu muri Kaminuza ya Zurich mu Busuwisi.
Mu minsi ishize aherutse kumurika ubundi bushakashatsi yari yakoze, busiga avumbuye indwara nshya yibasira abari mu rushako rutameze neza cyane cyane ab’igitsina gore, ayita ‘Relationship Disappointment Stress Syndrome’. Iterwa n’intimba abantu bagira nyuma yo kutabona ibisa n’ibitangaza bari biteze umunsi bazaba bashatse abagabo cyangwa abagore.
Intego nyamukuru y’ubu bushahashatsi bushya yari ugusesengura uburyo ihungabana n’ubushobozi bw’umubyeyi mu guhangana na ryo bishobora kugira ingaruka ku buzima bwe bwite ndetse n’ubw’umukobwa we ndetse n’uko bigenda biturutse ku mwana.
Bwibanze ku kumenya uko ihungabana ry’ibyabaye mu bihe byashize, ubushobozi bwo kubyakira n’ubwo kubinyuramo neza bishobora guhererekanywa hagati y’ababyeyi n’abana babo.
Bwakorewe mu Mujyi wa Kigali no mu ntara z’u Rwanda, ku babyeyi b’abagore 309 n’abana babo b’abakobwa 309, bukaba bwarakozwe mu gihe cy’imyaka ine.
Bwagaragaje ko ku mpuzandengo, ababyeyi banyuze mu bibazo cyangwa ibihe bikomeye bingana na 47% y’ibyafatiwe ibipimo, mu gihe abakobwa babo banyuze mu bibazo bingana na 41% by’ibyafatiwe ibipimo.
Ku bijyanye n’ibimenyetso by’ihungabana rishingiye ku byabaye ‘PTSD’, ababyeyi bagaragaje ibingana na 29% y’ibyapimwe, mu gihe abakobwa bagaragaje 25% y’ibyafatiwe ibipimo.
Bwagaragaje ko ihungabana ryabaye ku babyeyi rigirana isano ikomeye n’uko abakobwa babo bagaragaza ibimenyetso by’ihungabana rishingiye ku byo umuntu anyuramo.
Ni ukuvuga ko iyo umubyeyi yanyuze mu matage menshi, bigira ingaruka ku buzima bwo mu mutwe bw’umukobwa we.
Ariko ku rundi ruhande, byagaragaye ko ihungabana ry’abakobwa ritagira ingaruka ku babyeyi babo.
Mu yandi magambo ubu bushakashatsi bwagaragaje ko ihungana rishobora kuva ku babyeyi rijya ku bana, ariko ntirive ku bana rijya ku babyeyi.
Ubushakashatsi kandi bwerekanye ko ubushobozi bwo kwihangana no kudaheranwa n’ibibazo ‘resilience’ butagarukira ku muntu umwe gusa, ahubwo bugira ingaruka mu muryango wose.
Umubyeyi uhanganye neza n’ingaruka z’ibyamubayeho agira ibimenyetso bike bya PTSD, kandi ibyo bigafasha n’umwana we.
Ku rundi ruhande, umukobwa na we iyo afite ubushobozi bwo kwihangana, ntabwo ari we wenyine bigirira akamaro, kuko bifasha n’umubyeyi we kubona imbaraga zo kudaheranwa n’ibikomere by’ahashize.
Ni ukuvuga ko ubushobozi bwo kwihangana na bwo bushobora guhererekanywa mu muryango kimwe n’ihungabana.
Mu kiganiro yagiranye na IGIHE, Dr. Mutuyimana yavuze ko ubu bushakashatsi bwari ngombwa; cyane mu Rwanda, igihugu cyasigaranye ingaruka z’igihe kirekire n’ihungabana byaturutse kuri Jenoside yakorewe Abatutsi mu 1994.
“Abigisha, abafata ibyemezo bumve ko hari indi nkuru nziza y’uko ababyeyi bacu badahererekanya ibibi gusa ahubwo n’ibyiza. Ibi bigaragazwa n’ibyo tubona bidukikije ubu n’iterambere tumaze kugeraho. Kuvuga ibi byiza birubaka.”
Yavuze ko ibyavuye mu bushakashatsi bikwiye kubera isomo rikomeye buri wese uharanira ko we n’igihugu cye batera imbere.
Ati “Ibyo biraha inshingano ababyeyi yo gutanga icyiza, abana na bo bamenye ko uko bagaragaza gukomeza ubuzima no kutiyangiza, aba ari ko bari kwiyubaka, kubaka umuryango no kubaka ahazaza hacu twese kuko uri urubyiruko none ejo ni we uzaba ari umubyeyi.”
Yavuze ko nubwo sosiyete Nyarwanda ifite ibibazo byinshi yanyuzemo, ariko hari n’ibindi byiza byo kurata.
Ati “Twabonye ko umubyeyi afite uruhare runini mu uko umuryango uzaba kurusha umwana. Umwana we ni igiteranyo cy’ibyo anyuramo iwabo.”
“Ikindi ni ukuvuga ko iyo uri umwana, ukaba ubana n’abafite ibikomere uba ukwiye kubimenya ukirinda kubirya ahubwo ukareba imbaraga bafite, kuko iyo ukomeye ukomeza n’abatentebutse. Umwana mwiza atera ineza ababyeyi be.”
Dr. Mutuyimana yavuze ko impamvu ubushakashatsi bukorwa hari icyo buba bushaka kugaragaza, bityo bwajya bukoreshwa mu nzego bireba kugira ngo butange umusaruro.
